Just Smile

Pokemon – A Jamaican proctologist. Rectum – What women do to all the cars they drive. Dilate – To show up late for your own funeral. Urine – The opposite of being out. Dust – Mud without the juice. Impotence – No hard feelings Adorable – The button you push when you arrive at someone’s home. Kidnap – What children do when they are tired. Pharmacist – Someone who helps out on the farm. Clothes Dryer – Sock eating ...

He took me from a bar, He took me in his car. He took my top off. He puts his lips on mine, But don't worry, I'm a bottle of wine! What's an average 6 inch long inside a guy's pants and girls love to blow it up? A: 1000 Rupees Note Always think positive! In which situation, Do men start sweating in 10 mins and women want to go and on and on? think.. think.. SHOPPING God Bless Your Naughty Mind! Smile is the ...

A man asked a fairy to make him desirable & irresistible to all women. She turned him into a credit card. Cop pulls man over for suspicion of drunk driving. Cop: Sir have you been drinking? Man: No. Cop: Papers. Man: Scissors, I win! Seeing a spider is nothing. It becomes a problem when it disappears. Dear Warner Bros: Now that I'm an adult, I feel I'm am old enough to hear what the "Beep Beep" is hiding when ...

The questions are: 1. What would you do if I died? 2. Do I look fat? 3. What are you thinking about? 4. Do you love me? 5. Do you think she is prettier than me? What makes these questions so difficult is that every one is guaranteed to explode into a major argument if the man answers incorrect (I mean tells the truth). Therefore, as a public service, each question is analyzed below, along with possible responses. 1. ...

I'm pretty sure that after reading this, you would surely like to be in Prison> and not Work In Prison: You spend the majority of your time in an 8x10 cell. At Work: You spend most of your time in a 6x8 cube. In Prison: You get three meals a day. At Work: You get a break for 1 meal and you have to pay for it. In Prison: You get time off for good behavior. At Work: You get rewarded for good behavior with more work. In ...

One day a college professor was greeting his new college class. He stood up in front of the class and asked if anyone in the class was a moron, and if they were, they should stand. After a minute a young man stood up. The professor then asked the kid if he actually thought he was a moron. The kid replied, 'No, I just didn't want to see you standing there all by yourself'. A woman got on a bus holding a baby. The bus ...

This is from an actual trial in the UK: A young woman who was several months pregnant boarded a bus. When she noticed a young man smiling at her she began feeling humiliated on Account of her condition. She changed her seat and he seemed more amused. She moved again and then on her third move he burst out laughing. She had him arrested. Then the case came before the court, the young man was asked why he acted in ...

I have never let schooling interfere with my education. College is a refuge from hasty judgement The freshmen bring a little knowledge in and the seniors take none out, so it accumulates through the years. Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education. If all the students who slept through lectures were laid end to end, they would all be a lot more comfortable. Education is what remains when one has forgotten ...

A man was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said: "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess". He bent over, picked up the frog and put it in his pocket. The frog spoke up again and said: "If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I will stay with you for one week." The man took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it and returned it to the pocket. The frog then cried ...

If they squeeze olives to get olive oil, how do they get baby oil? "I think my thinking thinks thoughts that thought they think they're thinking when I'm thinking. I thought i think my thoughts, but I thought wrong." Don't trust your heart because its not on the right side. Words of wisdom ~ No one is listening until you fart. They say that when you dream about somebody, they went to sleep thinking about you. Quick! ...

Q: I run over fields and woods all day. Under the bed at night I sit not alone. My tongue hangs out, up and to the rear, awaiting to be filled in the morning. What am I? Q: What can run but never walks, has a mouth but never talks, has a head but never weeps, has a bed but never sleeps? Q: A certain crime is punishable if attempted but not punishable if committed. What is it? Q: What goes around the world but ...

Beer is always wet. Frigid beer is good beer. Beer always goes down easily. Beer never gets a headache. You can share a beer with your friends. You don't have to wine and dine beer. You don't have to wash a beer before it tastes good. You always know you are the first one to pop a beer. You can enjoy beer every day of the month. You can have more than one beer and not feel guilty. If you pour a beer right you'll always ...

A woman does not have a man's habit to scratch her noggin when she thinks of an answer to a confusing question, for example - Woman do not like to show they are confused. They never want to ruin their hair with that gesture either. Justified! Women need to cry. And they won't do it alone unless they know you can hear them. The average number of items in a typical woman's bathroom is 437. A man would not be able to identify ...

Man discovered COLORS and invented PAINT Woman discovered PAINT and invented MAKEUP Man discovered WORD and invented CONVERSATION Woman discovered CONVERSATION and invented GOSSIP Man discovered AGRICULTURE and invented FOOD Woman discovered FOOD and invented DIET Man discovered FRIENDSHIP and invented LOVE Woman discovered LOVE and invented LOVE TRIANGLES Man discovered TRADING and invented MONEY, Woman discovered ...

1. On a Beauty Parlor : "Don't Whistle at the Girl going out from here. She may be your GrandMother " 2. On a Bulletin Board : "Success is Related. More the Success, More the Relatives" 3. Sign at a Barber's Saloon : "We need your Heads to Run our Business" 4. A Traffic Slogan : "Don't let your kids drive if they are not Old enough or else They Never Will Be" 5. Sign in a Restaurant : "All drinking water in this ...

Here is Trick Recharge ur phone every month freely by following this process. Please follow the instruction & you can recharge your SIM card absolutely free. Yes it is possible, see how technology can be used to make anyone a fool! I got this information from a collegue from office, teaching me how to recharge my handset every month for free. I am going to share this to all of you. Please follow the instructions ...

If the #2 Pencil is so popular why is it still #2? Ok, so what's the speed of dark? Why do psychics have to ask for your name? Why do they sterlize the needles for lethal injections> If a cow laughs hard, does milk come out of its nose? The "Psychic Friends Network" went out of business.. didn't they see it coming? Is it possible for someone to become addicted to therapy? And If so, how would wyou treat them? If Wal-Mart is lowering prices every day, how come nothing in the store is free yet? Why do we drive on the parkway and park in the driveway? And if it is misspelled, how would we know? Would a fly without wings be called walk? If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill ...

***Fraud with Innocent Boys *** ***Fun with Handsome Boys*** *** Friendship with Charming Boys *** *** Contact with Intelligent Boys *** *** Flirt with Freaky Boys *** *** Love with Faithful Boys *** & at the end *** Marriage with the Rich Boy ...

Here are some hillarious but embarrassing moments: 1. A woman and her sister were at the mall and passed by a store that sold a variety of nuts. As they were looking at the display case, the boy behind the counter asked if they needed any help. The woman replied, "No, I'm just looking at your nuts." The sister started to laugh hysterically, the boy grinned, and she turned beet red and walked away. 2. A mother was taking a shower when her 2 year old son came into the bathroom and wrapped himself in toilet paper. Although he made a mess, he looked adorable, so she ran for the camera and took a few pics. They came out so well that she had copies made and included one with each of their Christmas ...

1. FINE - this is the word women use to end an argument when she knows she is RIGHT & YOU need to SHUT UP. 2. NOTHING - means SOMETHING & you need to be WORRIED. 3. GO AHEAD - this is a dare, not permission, do NOT do it. 4. WHATEVER - is a woman's way of saying SCREW YOU 5. THAT'S OK - she is thinking long & hard on HOW & WHEN you will pay for your mista ...

For those who don't know who is "Rajnikaanth" He never wet his bed as a child, the bed wet itself in fear. Once the facebook's founder was hospitalised, Because he poked him. Once he participated in a race, he came 1st, Einstein died after watching that, because.... light came 2nd. When he was in class 3, teacher told him to write an essay on anything, Today that essay is known as WIKIPEDIA. He once wrote his biography, Today that book in known as GUINNESS BOOK OF WORLD RECORD. When he does push ups, He is not lifting himself up, He is pushing the earth down. When he joined facebook, the next second he got a notification, that facebook wants to be his friend. He once hit a six, and ...